Settling In...

(too bad too it was a good picture of the fam)
(FYI...getting 8 people to sit and all smile and look at the same time at the camera....impossible!)

Wow...What a whirlwind the past few weeks have been. I think back to just one week ago and it's mind boggling to me that I was in Africa. A week ago I was ripping my hair out (I know I don't have hair, funny) with the loudness and whining of 5 kids and a baby (The Stewarts kids plus ours). A week ago I was missing my family in America, who was waiting for me to come home and start the next phase of the family. Today I'm sitting in my recliner, typing away on normal speed internet access, listening to the noise and loudness of the newly formed household.

The kids are all adjusting as well as they possibly can be. I'm actually shocked and amazed at how well everyone is getting along. After being in that African hotel room and listening to the constant cries of Cinco, the non stop calls for "beeesket" (Liberian for cookie or cracker), wiping poo-poo hiney's 4 or 5 times a day, I was so nervous about how this all was going to work out. But God is glorious. It's been pretty fun here. Kids playing, talking, laughing. Mom and Dad finding time for everyone, even though it seems like someone is always being forgotten or lost in the crowd. Cinco hasn't whined as much, heck hardly at all. Although he is still a stinking poop factory. Tres is so much more comfortable now that we are in "America". She has taken to having her room with Uno, her dolls and a virtual toy store of toys to goof off with. She hasn't had one of her wailing fits since being home. and Siete...Well he's still the man. He's learned that crying is the way to get what you want in the U.S.A! And that food is here all the time and his mouth is open all the time, what a perfect marriage.

At dinner last night, I'm looking at these 7 kids and it hit me that, there are 7 freaking kids at my table!!! Good grief. Each one has their own little personality and future ahead of them. It's going to be interesting to see how it all plays out and what the new routines will be like and which kids gravitate towards each other. We have the momma wanna be in Uno, the quiet yet confident singer in Tres, the human tornado in Cinco, the proud big brother in Dos, the confused yet goofy Sies, the want to be 9, but still only 4 year old Quatro and then the "I'm the man...feed me" Siete. How amazing is this? How cluttered and loud and congested is this? How Awesome!!

God is so merciful and gives us all we need to make it through the challenges of this life. He's given us the means to take in 7 children. He's given us the patience to get through the days of stress here at home as well as in Africa. He's blessed Wife and I with a love for each other that is like no other. He's blessed us with an instant desire to love these 7 kids, which is a miracle for me, because frankly...I do not like kids, toddlers especially. (As 3 of them are in the playroom yelling at each other and fighting over toys!).

And so the chaos of our life will now continue. It's going to be a fun, interesting, stressful, rewarding, tiring,, loving and funny time. But most importantly, I pray it's a time/life of God's blessing's on these kids. All are hand picked by God to be a part of this family, in order to bring more people to His family.

God is so Good!

Tick Tick Tick

44 hours and counting. Packing has been funny...I think I've counted my outfits about 30 times and I'm not even close to being done packing my clothes. I just want to be sure I have enough outfits to not have to worry when I'm there, but don't want to carry more than needed.

All the logistical things are starting to weigh on me a bit. Like, what exactly am I supposed to be getting after I go to the embassy? How early do I need to be at the airport when we leave Liberia? How can I be sure the hotel has a confirmation for me? It's not like we used Hotels.com to book the thing :). Did I bring enough snacks?

I am realizing through all of this though, I love it. I love the fact that God has empowered me and prepared me to be strong enough to travel to Africa to pick up 3 children. The "stresses" of doing this all could be so much more damaging had God not hand picked me to go to Liberia last year and gotten my international travel feet under me. God's made me such a closet Type-A person...I've got my lists, my itineraries, my lists about my lists, my printed emails, items in zip lock bags with labels on them and more lists about my lists. It's awesome.

I still giggle at the thought of two guys walking up to the embassy with the 3 little kids saying..."Yes, We are here to adopt them"...it's a very "happy" thought....if you know what I mean. So many of my friends in Massachusetts would be sooooo proud!

I think one of the neatest things I have been given the opportunity to do is to hand out photo albums and gifts for some of the children being adopted by families here in the U.S. I hope some of those kids will understand what the pictures mean and start to get that excited feeling, that they will have homes soon enough...no more cramped living and sleeping...no more wondering about how much food or water there is...no more wondering who their forever family is. God is so Awesome to give me this opportunity!

Totally off subject...if you haven't seen Wild Hogs and/or Blades of Glory...you are missing out. 2 very funny movies.

Post more soon!
God is Amazing in all He does in our lives.

Ryan and Randy's Excellent Adventure

Ya dude....Down to like one gnarly week....AIR GUITAR!!!!

Been a month since I blogged here....and now it'll be like a flood of info. Ryan and I are leaving in exactly 1 week. Visa's, Passports, Malarone....all are in and ready. One big suitcase is packed, another is partly packed. It seems like we've been waiting forever to finally go and now the date is 1 week away!!!

I am so blessed ot have an incredible friend in Ryan to share this experience with me. He is a champ and a half and has his head on straight with the Lord. I can't wait to spend this time with him. I'm nervous to see how Cinco, Seite, and Tres respond to us, but I feel good knowing Ryan absolutely loves kids and kids love him immediately. So even if they are freaked out by me, I know they'll respond really good to him.

On the home front, we are pretty much prepared. Just finished putting the crib up. Installed the car seats earlier this week...(Have been asking God to forgive me for the swears...stupid things...). Going to help Wife build up a stand up thing for Seite to play/sit/stand in. Still need to get a couple of dressers. Lots of clothes have been donated/bought. I think it's safe to say...we are ready! not sure we will feel ready those first few days, but we are ready. God has prepared us and given us all we need for this next stage of life.

I find myself doubting a little, how ready I am to travel around the world with 3 little ones I don't know yet. It's going to be pretty interesting trying to understand who these 3 little humans are, get them to trust who I am, feed them at the right times, bathroom breaks with a 6 year old girl, going through customs, trying not to sleep on the plane with them with me, being the person in charge, taking all the pictures and notes to document the whole thing properly, hand out the gifts for the next adoptive families. It's official....I need a list!!

As the date to leave gets closer I'll be posting more up here. While on the trip, I should have internet access, so I will be posting up pictures and thoughts for that day. Please keep track of our trip and and comments would be great. It's great to hear and feel the encouragement.

God is truly Amazing!

Holy 409

Aaaahhhh...to be so new to it all. It's happened a few times now, I read something or learn something new at church and it hits me like a ton of bricks. My eyes are opened and I feel like a new creature in God again. This happened a few weeks ago as our pastor taught through Psalm 51. I hear it, I feel it and I start praying it and God just fires me up with his amazing lovingkindness. I then run to people and tell them all about it and how amazing it is and how it can too change your life. Most people down here are life long Christians and they give me a look like "Boy...you ain't from 'round these parts are ya?"

Have you ever taken time to read through Psalm 51 ? If not I recommend you sit down for an hour or so, read through it, pray it out loud to God. He teaches us to pray back to Him His word and Psalm 51 is a perfect piece of wisdom to pray right back to Him. I've asked God to take out the Holy 409 and clean me even more on the inside.

-----

A whirlwind of family times came to a close on Monday. During the last week in June we had my father in law and his wife in town for 5 days. It was great to sit and talk with them at night and just share our new family with them. It's always a treat for me to get some time with my father in law. He and Wife's mom were always amazing to me, in every way possible. (I still say to this day I never technically lived with them after Uno was born, but I can only say that because I didn't have mail delivered there...I did have my own room though.) It was great to talk about God with them and get a glimpse into their lives and relationships with Jesus. It's such an inspiration to me to see others living out the life God has put before them.

Then last week we had Wife's brother Andy come stay with us for a week or so with his wife Maureen and daughter Ashley. It was the first time I got to sit with them as a Christian and listen with an open heart, their views and thoughts and share my thoughts and views of Jesus and our lives here on earth. We got to share how God is working in our lives, prayed together and just hung out for the week. There was a lot of sore arms and necks from playing games on the Wii :)

I realized a few things from these visits. First, God is amazing and so in control of everything everywhere. Hearing stories about my father in law being talked to by God in the middle of the night and working on new ministry ideas. While doing that, God is pushing Andy to start his new life at a new church and giving him the peace he needs to make that transition. At the same time He is working on Wife and I with the adoption and patience. From Tennessee to Massachusetts to Texas, God is right there in control of it all. And that isn't even beginning to think about all the people all over the world God is with. Psalm 121 teaches us that God does not slumber nor sleep...think about the enormity of that.

Second I learned that God has really worked in me the last year or so. Biblical knowledge I didn't think I was retaining is actually in there. God has really opened my eyes to how He expects me to live and raise my family. I was so afraid I was going to be "different" when the family was in town, but I feel like I am really building a foundation on solid rock and not sinking sand. I don't know if we will ever be called to move back home or anywhere outside of where we are now. What I do know is, if it ever happens, God plan for us being here is working and we are so much stronger in Him. I believe He moved us down here, to remove us from all that kept us from Him. I can't wait to see how He uses us as we continue to grow.

----
Adoption Update: If you haven't been reading Wife's blog, you should be :). Seite is in the hospital and that is absolutely nerve wracking. He has been throwing up for a while now and they brought him to give him fluids and medication to try and stop it. It all sounds so basic and trivial, but in Africa it isn't. Too many babies, children and adults die of dehydration.

Cinco and Tres, from what we have been told are doing good. We got a new group picture and we can see Tres (fingers in mouth and all) and Tres in it and they look pretty good. Seite couldn't be found in the picture, we think we can see half of his head behind someone.

We are getting closer to traveling. Our paper work is moving along and passports are in. We are now just waiting for the "OK" to travel. I'm taking one my friends from the Liberia mission trip with me. He's going to help out with the 3 little ones. He's an amazing young man and I feel honored to be going with him.

I think that's all I have for now. Stupidly long post today, sorry. :) Hopefully I'll have more in the next few days.

All to His Glory

A Blessing I Didn't See...Until Now

Ever have a blessing stare you in the face, and you thought you were seeing it, only to have God rip the scales off your eyes to expose His true beauty and grace? The following was sent to me by my friend Tricia.
________________________

Daily Devotional by Max Lucado

"the One who came still comes and the One who spoke still speaks"

June 18th

He chose us in Him before the foundations of the world.

Ephesians 1:4 (NKJV)

Search the faces of the Cap Haitian orphanage for Carinette...The girl with the long nose and bushy hair and a handful of photos...The photos bear the images of her future family. She's been adopted.

Her adoptive parents are friends of mine. They brought her pictures, a teddy bear, granola bars, and cookies. Carinette shared the goodies and asked the director to guard her bear, but she keeps the pictures. They remind her of her home-to-be. Within a month, two at the most, she'll be there. She knows the day is coming....Any day now her father will appear. He came once to claim her. He'll come again to carry her home. Till then she lives with a heart headed home.

Shouldn't we all? Our Father paid us a visit too. Have we not been claimed? Adopted?... God searched you out. Before you knew you needed adopting, he'd already filed the papers and selected the wallpaper for your room.

Come Thirsty

Max Lucado

©2000 - 2007

Courtesy

Oak Hills Church

San Antonio, Texas

and NET-IMS, Inc.
________________________


Tricia has no idea how God used her to open my eyes into deeper truths about the life God has given me. The calling he has put into Wife and my lives to adopt, and I have said it a million times, is such a picture of our relationship with Jesus, as HE has hand picked us all and adopted us into Heaven through his death on the cross.

After reading this, I cried and I felt the love of God pour over me. What an amazing blessing I have been given. Any time now, I too will appear to take Tres, Cinco and Seite home. Their earthly daddy will be there to bring them to the home their Heavenly Daddy has ordained for them here on Earth. God has entrusted the lives of these 3 children to me and Wife to raise in His name and for the purposes only He knows. It's my prayer, that Wmilt and I will raise all of our children according to His will.

It's amazing to me how God just speaks to you, right through all distractions, right when you need it most. I've been struggling with having no father in my life. I have occasional email conversations with my dad, back in Massachusetts, but it isn't real. We never have had that Father/Son relationship every boy wants in life. I never knew my biological dad and my step-dad worked and had issues growing up. For whatever reason, this all has been on my heart and hurting for weeks.

I thank God for the very fact that even thought I can't pick up the phone to talk to a Dad here on earth, HIS phone never goes to voice mail. As a friend of mine says, and I just love it so much, he is my Papa. I have vowed to God, that I will too will live with a "Heart Headed Home".

I thank God for God. He used my friend to speak 2 truths into my life:

1. He has entrusted me to raise His children
   
2. I am His son and He loves me.

...All other ground is sinking sand...

Cowards of the Keyboard

We had our yard sale this past weekend. Friends from work and church were just incredible and donated items for us to sell. We ended up making over 800 bucks towards adoption fees, which is an awesome blessing. Thanks to everyone who helped out or came by and shopped.

In preparation for the yard sale, Wife posted it out on the BuySellTrade Yahoo group, explaining it was to help raise money to bring our kids home from Africa. Who knew it was going to start such a problem? We got roasted something good by people asking who we were and how people could know we weren't trying to scam them?!?!?!?

Here are some snippets of emails we received:

"I'm so sorry, I just remembered that you outright tole me that this adoption didn't go through and how upset and sad you and your husband were about it. I'm not gonna start anything here, but I will end with this, if you are lieing (sp?) to me, how do the rest of the people in this group know weather or not you are even telling the truth about adopting at all? Just something for everyone to think about. I for one DONT believe in lying.

Victoria"

"I am interested in knowing if you are the person that has been accused of scamming members of buyselltrade in reference to your adoption. My feeling is if you need money to adopt three children then you can't afford them in the first place. I have three adopted children so I know how expensive it can be. But if what you are claiming is not true then the kind and generous people in the Mayberry area need to know. I will help get the word out and I will also help you clear your name if your claims for these children are ligitimate. Please let me know. Eldora

My Reply:
"Here is the deal folks...As the moderator has already mentioned, keep
your personal feelings off this board. While I find it commendable
that Victoria and Eldora feel the need to inquire about 1. the
authenticity of a member on the board and 2. the financial status of
a member, lets remember it's none of your business.

A yard sale is a yard sales folks. Would you rather a family raise
funds to offset some of the costs to give kids a home? Or is it more
acceptable in this "me me me" world to have a yard sale so you can
purchase a new big screen tv?

I find it so amusing that you will question a family for doing the
right thing, behind the privacy of the internet. You know the address
of the yard sale, so stop being cowards, stop on over to the yard
sale and ask your questions face to face.

Moderators: I apologize for posting this, but as the father of these
3 children in Liberia and the 4 children already home, I felt the
need to put a few people in their place. I fully expect this post to
be removed, so please do accept my apologies.

Last note to these keyboard cowards, I think proper etiquette for
questions of such personal nature, is to email the person privately
and not show how ignorant you are to the rest of the community.

Thank you for your time. And I thank those of you who came out to
help us with our adoption, you are true blessings.

Randy ."

Amazing. What kills me is not one of these Cyber Cops showed up to talk to us in person. Unfortunately for them (and me) I loooove arguing :) We got a bunch of emails, some supporting us saying we are doing the right thing, others telling us we are scam artists and too poor to adopt..blah blah blah. Thankfully I know we aren't in the business of making people happy, just our Father.

Make me think about Saul. When he was hunting down the believers, non-believers were cheering and supporting his efforts. As soon as God removed the shales from Saul's eyes and he started preaching the Good News, his supporters wanted him dead as well. I guess today it's ok to raise money for self pleasing reasons, but attempt to do God's work and Satan has full control over people and attacks.

That being said, it was fun going "Boston" on them. I'm still trying to figure out what "Going Boston" means, people at work tell me to "Go Boston" all the time. I tell them after I eat a huge lunch..."That's going Boston"....or when I finish my work..."That's going Boston"...or when I get cranky and grumpy...."That's going Boston". It's fun.

On a totally different note...I bought the Daughtry CD...Yes..Chris Daughtry...from American Idol...and it's awesome. I hate to admit that, because I promised myself to never buy an American Idol CD...and I did. And I may buy Blake Lewis' Cd as well.

What a girl I have become.
--
His lovingkindness is Everlasting

Wandering in the Desert

Time to blog again. I haven't bored all 3 of you in a while and it's not because I haven't had thoughts, or things going on in life. It's just I have felt pretty removed from God lately and have been trying to pray and read my way through it all.

Losing those 3 kiddos crushed me more than I ever thought it would have. Which stinks because we are now in the process of trying to bring 2 little ones home. I am excited...but I am cautious. I don't feel like that is truely walking by faith, but I don't know how to just be overjoyed and excited about our new children, until I see them in the flesh in our arms. The 2 little guys are Blessing who is 2 or 3 years old and Messiah who is 5 months old. How exciting it'll be to have three boys in the house and one of them a baby. (I Love Babies...). As excited as it all can and will be...I just pray that these 2 are God's will for us.

It's such a weird time for us. I have been doubting the role God has in my life these last few weeks. Such great things are happening, while such hard things are happening too. It's so confusing. I feel like we are trying to be prepared for whatever new children God has for us by finding a home that is a little bigger or with more room in the yard and that doesn't have the safety issue of a pool that can't be fenced in. In doing so, we have had 2 houses lined up, but both have fallen through. We can't seem to sell our house which means we need to put offers in on houses with a contigence that our house will sell. The last house we lost (it has an acre of land, perfect for 6 or 7 kids to go and play in), had another offer come in with no contigencies, so naturally he accepted that offer and we had to back out. It felt like God had hand picked that property for us to raise His children, but of course I was wrong.

But then at work, I have been given a new job which has the potential to get me into a management position. My new job has me interacting with more people, being the sole person responsible for a piece of software the company uses, and I am on track to move out of a developers role (which I have never been a big fan of) and into a position of leading people. These are answered prayers, that really came out of nowhere. So this is amazingly good stuff.

So see, I'm so confused as to what the heck God's plans are. "Adopt these 3 children", "Here is a house to raise them in"...oh wait, never mind, these aren't your kids, a bigger home to raise them isn't needed (even though I led you there), here is another house, no wait never mind, here is a new job, here are 2 little guys. How is in the world does this all add up? I'm totally confused.

I keep praying for God's will...I think I "get" what it is we are supposed to do, then it's not what we are supposed to do at all. I know God's will rarely is on par with our will, I just want to do whats right by and for Him. Everytime I feel like we are, something else happens. Am I taking too much control over my life? Have I put my hand on the plow but looked back? (Luke 9:62).

All this being said, I am excited about what could be. I'm excited to see how this whole time in our lives is going to play out and what it is I am supposed to be learning. I know there is something here and really instead of coming on here and whining like the baby I am, I should be reading and praying and listening. How hard it is to focus on those things when you feel like you have been yet life doesn't seem to going the way you thought God wanted for you.

Till Next Time.

Life Goes On

Well we are moving on with life! Not adopting the 3 kiddos from Liberia still stings and we are still dealing with the feelings involved as a family. But, it's not holding us back. Someday we will look back and see how God used this time to further His kingdom, so for now we just rest in the fact that He is sovereign and in control. I wish it were easy to just remove my human feelings from it all, because I'm still hurt and confused and sad and mad.

I do wonder if those 3 kids going back to their parents is an answered prayer for them. I know I get so hung up on why God is doing this or that to me or my family, when I need to remember it's not all about me and my prayers. God hasn't said to us, "No more kids for you"...He's just said, "Not these 3 kids". Life is such an amazing journey.

So for now we are still attempting to buy a new house and sell our current house. If that all falls though, there will be another "what the trash" post :). We are still gearing up for the next adoption...it'll happen. I've never "known for sure" or "had that feeling" when it comes to kids and adoption, Wife has always had those feelings. I just know God has made me 100% sure we will adopt again. Maybe it won't be 3 more, may not be as soon as we would have hoped for and it may or may not be a baby. Who knows other than God!

Other News:
Please pray for my sister in law, Maureen and her family. She just lost her Mom to cancer and now is going in to have some lumps removed and tested.


And Lastly I ask that while you are praying, to keep all the kids of the world in your prayers. Adoption has really opened my eyes and heart to the fact that so many children are in need and alone.

God is Good my friends....He is Good.

We Just Don't Sit Still

So adoption isn't big enough for us...neither is a new (large) vehicle...and having new job responsibilities isn't quite enough...now we are looking at houses. One thing that can't be said for us...we are idle. Not sure it's healthy or not...but it works for us :)

Found the most awesome house ever...right out of New England. We put an offer in and waited for a week for the owner get pricing on a new roof. (our contingency was it needed a new roof, not the old wood shingle roof it has). He took a week to find any estimates at all, and in the mean time got a better offer than ours. Can't say I blame him for taking the other offer: More money, Earlier closing and No contingencies. Felt like a kick in the stomach. I pouted and acted like a 3 year old for about 1/2 a day or so.

But we pulled up our big boy and big girl pants...accepted our God given time out...wiped our alligator tears and blew our nose...and are praying over the next few houses we are going to see. We don't really want to move so much, we love our house and pool. But, if we can find that perfect house with a yard for the kids to play in (all 7 of them)...then that will be a little more comfortable.

What I love about my new life in Christ though...is as I grow more in my walk with Him...things like losing a house to a higher bid, isn't as important as it once would have been. Like I said I pouted and got upset, but it went away pretty quickly when I had my quiet time with Him. He has full control of everything else in our lives and He has our better interest in mind. I think it's OK to be upset about silly things as long as it doesn't consume your life. (That's not backed by anything biblical, just my opinion..which could be totally wrong...I like to try and justify myself!)

So if moving is what He wants from us...we'll be moving.

The adoption stuff is still going without too many issues...Thank You Jesus! We are at the mercy now of the Liberian and US governments. For an adoption timeline of events, check out Emily's blog.

Red Sox opening day is right around the corner. In a couple of weeks, I'll be able to see them play in person for the first time in 2 years. I'll be in Dallas to see them play the Rangers...Like a little boy I'm excited out of my skin. Seriously, after God and my beautiful wife and kids...I absolutely LOVE the Red Sox. They were/are always there, year in and year out. They were my refuge when I had nothing else in life growing up. (Does that sound absolutely pathetic after I read it back? Actually yes it did...but it's how I really feel, so oh well!)

As Always: God Is Good!!!

Testimony - A New Life

Wife and I move alot. We are currently in our 4th house in 6 years. In November of 2003 we moved to Oxford Massachusetts and started going to CrossPoint church. I was so uncomfortable looking for a new church. And when I say I was uncomfortable looking for a new church, I mean I was uncomfortable with Wife looking for a new church. I took no interest in finding one. As much as god was starting to stir in me, I was ready to drop this whole "church" thing and not go anymore. BUT, low and behold she found a church similar to CrossWay in our last town. So we went, some of us more begrudgingly then others.

This was the first taste of God showing is humor and power. He moved us from a place I was comfortable being one of the faces in the crowd, to Touchy/Feely Central. The pastor there, Jeff...he freaked me out to no end. He's a hyper, huggy, jumping up and down, outwardly a Jesus Freak. Here I am, just barely getting comfortable with the idea of church, and now this guy would tell me he loves me, hug me, ask about my family and work. In a word - "Nut Job". (ok that's 2 words, but you get the point). I was ready to quit but once again, Uno and now Dos kept me going. I never want to disappoint my kids and wife. I have many times, probably will a few more times, but I knew I wouldn't have been a disappointment to them if I kept going, even if my heart wasn't fully in it.

Jeff turned out to be one of the key reasons I accepted Jesus. All that freaked out nonsense turned into a real deep respect. I still never showed I was into all the stuff the church was doing, but every Sunday we would be there and I would be soaking it all in. We stayed at that church for just about 2 years until we moved (again). I had accepted a job in Mayberry and we were moving out of New England for the first time.

About that job in Marberry: A Divine Move by God. Wife and I couldn't afford the bills and cost of living where we were. In September or October of 2004, I started to look for a new job. I wanted to work with one software so that's all I did my job searches on. Fast forward to March of 05, with no real leads on a job. I gave in and did 1 search for the software I did not want to work with anymore, applied to 2 of the jobs I found. A week later Wife and I are on the plane to Mayberry to interview for the job I eventually took.

As we prepared to move to Mayberry, we were cleaning out our house for the move. I brought a bunch of donation items over to the church and I had a short, but life changing talk with Jeff. I apologized to him for never being the religious type and for always being so quiet and non responsive to him and the church. He talked to me for a little while and told me, and these words will stay with me forever, “It’s not how religious you are, it’s how your relationship with Him is”. (to many, this may be the most "whatever" statement, or full of so much common sense, but for me then and even now, it was like someone took the blindfold off.

Those words stuck with me as I drove by myself to Mayberry, to start my new job. Wife and the kids would meet me down there a few weeks later. That 4 day drive down from Massachusetts to Texas ended up being me and God having a 4 day conversation. I gave my life to Jesus on that trip. Each night in whatever hotel I was staying in, I would be reading something from the bible, trying to figure out what I just accepted. I'd end up thinking about how real Ron was. I'd think about the passion Jeff portrayed. I'd think about how Andy and Wife changed, but didn't change (if that makes sense). I'd pray about Jesus up on that cross. It was an amazing 4 days. I want to say it was totally quiet and solemn, but I had Metallica and Korn playing in the background. :) It's was and still is a life long process!

Life didn’t change too dramatically for me right away. I was more comfortable going to church. I actually looked forward to finding a church with Wife , instead of her finding it and I just tag along. In the 2 years or so that I've been focusing on Jesus, Wife and my lives have changes so much. We've adopted 2 little girls. I've cleaned out my closet with my wife and God saved a marriage. I've been on a few mission trips. We are adopting again :).

Those are all nice and fine...but the most important thing I see that has happened is Wife and I are trying to make decisions for God and not for us. We focus on God and our family. Wife pretty much always has focused on the family...I was so focused on me. God has really moved me to clean up my act. And while I'm still a sinner (aren't we all)...my eyes are focused up and not around.

--GOD'S AWESOMENESS DURING THESE TIMES--

Did you read that I spent 4 days talking to him :) How amazing is that? God picked me and my family up from Massachusetts and all the distractions that were pulling us away from Him (or in my case, the distractions keeping me from Him) and He plopped us down in the middle of nowhere. Literally...We are about 5 hours away from any major cities. But He knew, and we understand that this is what was needed.

I pray that this story will inspire someone who isn't in a relationship with Jesus to see: If God can save a sorry, selfish, self serving person like me, He more than wants to have that intimate 1 on 1 relationship with you. And for those who have fallen away...No matter what you may have done, not done, how quiet it may be or how noisy it seems...He's still there and he's waiting for you to come back home.

My last post about my testimony will be directly related to missions and adoption.

God is Good!

If I Had Only Know Then...

*Adoption Update - We are closer to having Maggy, JD and Isaac home. The social worker met up with their parents in Liberia and verified that they understand what adoption means and that they wanted to go through with having their children adoption. That is a huge relief. We are paper or 2 away from having all the paperwork complete. After that we need to wait for clearance from both governments. It's getting closer though! I'll keep you all up to date as things happen.

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So I am in total awe. I'm in Dallas for some work related training and I am out here with a coworker who is a great guy. I've been getting to know him more as we begin to work together (I'm switching job roles at work, same work, different software). He and I got to talking at dinner last night, and my whole life story/testimony came out. It wasn't an intentional "time to preach" conversation. It just was a part of the conversation...a natural thing for me to talk about with him as we shared parts of our growing up lives with each other.

I'm in awe because, when I was growing up, if I had known then what I know now, it would have made it more bearable to live back then. God has been so AMAZING to me, even when I wasn't thinking about Him, living for Him, caring about Him. I'm humbled to tears when I think about it. He has watched over me, picked me up, moved me out of harms way, allowed me to make mistakes and He has loved me for my entire life, even when I wasn't loving Him.

I've been praying about this, and I feel like it's the right thing to do. Over the next few days, I'm going to write out my testimony on here. I don't know why I feel like I need to, but I feel like it's the right thing to do. Many of you know the story of how God has worked in my life, some don't. It's my prayer that, as you read it, you will think about all God has done in your life and give Him all the thanks, praise and glory.

I pray God's blessing on all who stop by and keep up with the the happenings in my and my families life.

God is Good!

Lucky Number 7

7...what a number. 1 more than 6, 1 less than 8. So good a number that Boston Bruins great Ray Bourque wore 2 of them on his hockey jersey (77). Seven...so good that it's the "luckiest" number of them all. There are 7 days in a week and 7 dwarfs who help snow white. Charles Dickens was born on Feb 7th (1812). Matches were first sold on April 7th (1827 in England). Billy Graham was born on Nov 7 (1918). 7...what a great number.

I got to thinking about all the books in the Bible that have a 7th chapter. (thank you Jon for the idea) In each of them a command or vital life teaching is taught. I've listed some of them below. God commands, We listen. That's what life is right? I'm sure you wondering why I am going on and on about the number 7? Well it is 2007. And what a better way to celebrate the "lucky" number 7...then by having 7 children :) God willing we will indeed have that many. 2 Biological, 2 domestically adopted and 3 adopted from Liberia. Augustus' parents were tracked down and they relinquished their rights to him...as well as his 5 year old brother and 8 year old sister. Guess who will probably be coming to live with us? Yep, Augustus (2 or 3 yrs old) and his 5 year old brother and 8 year old sister.

Taking a step in obedience of the Lord is sometimes easy (Mathew 7 - don't judge others), sometimes it's hard (Judges 7 - Hey Gideon, go slay an army with only 300 men) and sometimes it so over your head and out of the realms of understanding (Genesis 7 - Yea Noah, God here and I'm thinking about drowning out everything I created, so how about you go build a boat, put your family on it and every animal, bird and crawly thing. Oh why don't you stay on there until I tell you it's clear to get off of it. Super, thanks!).

If God provides these 3 new children to us, I will categorize this blessing/command as totally over my head. That being said, if you were feeling the need to pray for something, feel free to pass up a prayer of peace and sanity over our house. I don't like asking for prayers, but this adventure we are about to embark on, it's larger than any one we have ever been on. God has put us at ease about this decision, but that doesn't mean it'll be easy or doubt won't creep in. I pray that he will continuously prepare our hearts and minds for the naysayers, the adversity, the stress, the good times, the bad times, the funny looks of strangers, the gossip, the financial obligations, the nights of tears, the nights of giggles, the dances, the games, the unity of our family.

I'll be writing more about this as the process goes along.

Psalm 7:17 (of course it's 7:7teen) - I will give thanks to the LORD because of his righteousness and will sing praise to the name of the LORD Most High.

God is Good!

---Some of the Chapter 7's from the Bible------

Genesis 7 - God commands Noah to build the ark
Exodus 7 - God commands Moses and Aaron to say everything He commands them. God commands Aaron to tell Pharaoh to let the Israelites out of Egypt
Numbers 7 - God commands Moses to accept offerings at the Tent of Meeting and give them to the Levites as required
Deuteronomy 7 - God gives His command to Israel for driving out the nations
Joshua 7 - God commands Joshua to remove from Israel that which is devoted to destruction
Judges 7 - God commands Gideon to defeat the midianites with 300 men
2 Samuel 7 - God promises David that his name will be made great, and God will establish a house for him.
2 Chronicles 7 - God commands Solomon to observe His commands and decrees. In return God promises to establish Solomon’s royal throne
Nehemiah 7 - God commands Nehemiah to assemble those who will return
Ecclesiastes 7 - God teaches us about wisdom
Zechariah 7 - god commands Zechariah to love, show mercy and do not think evil of each other
Matthew 7 - Jesus teaches on judging others and if you ask you shall receive, knock and the door will be opened
Luke 7 - Jesus teaches that through faith He will heal, raise the dead and bless us
John 7 - Jesus teaches that all who believe in Him, the streams of living water will flow from within him
Acts 7 - The prophet is quoted "The earth in my footstool, Has not my hand made all these things?"

Can You Stop the Power of...

THE YAWN!!!

I defy you to look at these pictures, and NOT yawn. It can't be done! (And if you do succeed, you need to tell me, so I can call you the dirty liar you are!) Why the heck is that? I did some research and no one really has a good theory as to why we yawn when we see others yawning. It always made me giggle when I took the train to work, you'd see it like, well like a train of people yawning. One starts and it would go on for like 10 or 15 people.

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We had the home study last night, another step in the process of bringing another baby home. I'll be honest, I despise that part of the process. The entire growing up story has to come out and regardless if I'm 30 or 130 it'll still suck having to talk about my youth. God's awesome in how he used all the junk to mold me into who I am, but there are still feelings in there about my family.

But really who doesn't have something from childhood of their family that they don't cringe about. I guess it comes down to the fact that every generation has a chance to break the cycle of family junkness. This isn't to say you won't start a new cycle of something odd or bizarre. I just mean, for me personally its a chance to raise children without the influence of drugs/alcohol/pornography/verbal or physical abuse. God's so cool to give me the opportunity to right my families wrongs, while still giving me room to make my own mistakes as a parent.

Well this episode of Dr. Phil has been brought to you by Cyber Depends....for those who have diarrhea of the blog

FYI: I have decided, if I ever change my name, it's totally going to be "Awesome". I just want to introduce myself: "Hi, I'm Awesome"

God is Good!

1 Down...How Many More to Go???

So as many already know, and for those who don't know...Augustus, as of right now, will not be coming into our family. As seasoned veterans of the game of adoption, it should not have come as a surprise, which it didn't. BUT surprised or not, the sting is still there. I pray for him and whatever family he has that will be apart of his life.

That all being said, I got to thinking and reading and praying. In doing so my favorite story in the bible "popped" into my head, so I turned to it and read it again. The Prodigal Son has so many great things to it, yet for me right now, it was a perfect call for me to be excited and ready. For those who don't know the story or want to read it again, it's here: http://www.biblegateway.com/passage/?search=Luke%2015:11-32;&version=49;

Reading through it, it doesn't pertain exactly to not bringing home another child. But it did make me think about how excited and happy God is when we return to Him after turning our backs on him. In the same way the father in the Prodigal son parable is looking for his son to return (20But while he was still a long way off, his father saw him and felt compassion for him, and ran and embraced him and kissed him.), I too will be ready to run to my new son and embrace him and make him an official part of our family.

This story goes on to talk about how the father has the fattened calf killed to eat. I can't promise I'll be busting out the old calf killing...maybe I can make him some grilled cheese or something :)

God is Good people...even when it feels like life is blah...He is Still Good...I'd even go as far to say...He's Perfect. (bold I know...but that's what I am...a risk taker)

God is Good!

Well That Was FAST!!!

So as a quick follow up to my last post...you know listening to God...bringing another baby home...all that jazz. Yea God is pretty darn fast. Wednesday Night at around 4pm or so, Wife got a call from Pastor Wesley. Long story short - We are starting the process on a little guy!! 2 year old Augustus was dropped off at Pastor Wesleys house and his mom relinquished the rights to him. So God gave me about 20 hours or so to digest the fact that we are adopting again.

I think at times, God forgets that I like to make the jokes...I don't like it when he makes the jokes!! Sweet Gracious.

God is Good!

Video of Our New Daughters

Galatians 4:4-5 - But when the fullness of the time came, God sent forth His Son, born of a woman, burn under the Law, so that He might redeem those who were under the Law, that we might receive the adoption as sons.

I've talked about my thoughts about adoption and how it is a living picture of our relationship with God, through the sacrifice of Jesus. I found the above bit of scripture while having some quiet time this week. These few verses again, solidified in me, that we have nothing if Jesus did not come and die for our sins. We are adopted into His kingdom through the sacrifice He made for us.

We have been thinking about adoption, again. Anyone who knows me, knows I drop my head, I roll my eyes, I groan and I sigh whenever Wife talks about adoption. But I can't deny the fact that, through Wife's heart for children and her desire to have a large family, God has opened my heart to more kids. I am beyond amazed by how God can change a mans heart, but I can attest he has changed mine.

That being said, we'll be updating the home study, filing the paper work and praying over babies and situations. I have absolutely no idea how in the world we will pay for it, find room for him or her, have room in our vehicle to transport the family. I just know it feels right and if adopting is meant to be, Our savior will figure all that out and let me know about it when the time is right. To me it sounds like such a christian cliche, but I feel like we are taking a huge leap of faith. All I know is He is telling my heart, don't let him or her spend another night alone.

He's opened my eyes to the happiness a family brings to all of it's members. He's also shown me the loneliness and sadness of being alone. He's shown me this in my personal life, but more so through my time at Recas Orphanage in Romania and the Greater Love Children's Home in Liberia. God has blessed me with decent money, shelter, an amazing wife and family, eternal salvation and a fire to spread his word and love to all who will listen. How can I turn my back on a little one, when I have the means to open my heart to him or her.

None of this sounds like anything I have ever said. :) And no, I'm not drunk.
God is Good!

Family Officially Larger!!

Well yesterday (Dec 18th) we officially adopted the girls. We are now a family of 6! What a relief to no longer have to worry about birth parents or social workers coming around. Of course this also means 2 more college tuitions to save for...doh! :) And now the search begins for a brother or 2 for Dos and the girls. Although Dos did tell us he felt so sad for the orphans of the world, cried about it, talked about how he wants to help so bad and how sad it is, yet when we asked if he would share his room with an orphan if one were to come live with us, he said with a straight face...there isn't enough room in here. Gotta love being 6.

Anyone praying over and contemplating adoption, I will say this: It took me forever to accept adoption as a way to increase our family. The fear of not being able to love the adopted children, the thought of being able to afford it, questioning my own parenting skills with someone "elses" child...(all which turned out to be a bunch of hooey!) In adoption you not only give kids a home and family, you are living out a true representation of our relationship with Jesus Christ.

Ephesians 1:3-6
Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us with every spiritual blessing in the heavenly places in Christ, just as He chose us in Him before the foundation of the world, that we would be holy and blameless before Him In love He predestined us to adoption as sons through Jesus Christ to Himself, according to the kind intention of His will, to the praise of the glory of His grace, which He freely bestowed on us in the Beloved.

When you take a child into your home to raise, love, provide for and call yours forever....this is exactly what Jesus has done for everyone of us. He loves us, He provides for us and He calls us HIS forever...and this was all done because God CHOSE to.

God is Good!